Review: Red Dawn (2012)

Red Dawn (2012)
Dir: Dan Bradley

Cert 15 / Running time 114 mins

Finally seeing the light of day (this was filmed in 2009) Red Dawn imagines a scenario where North Korea brings bloody terror to America's doorstep. As most people will likely know, its a remake of the 1984 movie starring people from pretty much every important movie of the 80's. That movie wasn't exactly dynamite at the time nor is it a tale that really needed updating, but hey. We're bought up to speed by a multimedia show at the start of the movie, full of news clips and sound-bites, engineered to paint a picture of a North Korea primed to attack America. For those that scoff at such a reality (as I did myself), pause to consider today's news. Timing is everything. 

The focus is on a small town in Washington as opposed to a large scale epic of how the war is fought on a global stage. The opening attack featuring the enemy planes dropping troops onto Desperate Houswives' suburbia is effective and jarring. From here, it's down to a group of teenagers to begin the resistance.

Pure disgusted at how long it took Red Dawn to be relased

The teenagers in question are led by Chris Hemsworth, who works well as Jed Eckert, veteran and older brother to Matt (played by Josh Peck - even though I couldn't help wondering if he was the milkman's based on lack of shared physical genes). Jed's training and experiences kick in as soon as they attack begins. There are plenty of moments intended to deliver an emotional punch, some hit the target (Eckert senior communicating to his boys through a loud-haler) some miss the target, but what Red Dawn majors on is action. Red Dawn is directed by Dan Bradley, the man who energised the Bourne movies by delivering fresh, raw stunts and fight sequences. This is no small feat - the Bourne movies are now regarded as intelligent, visceral action movies and it served as a catalyst for action movies in general as they clamoured to be more "Bourne-like" (even Bond owes it's new direction to the path Bradley's work laid out).

"Martha, those kids are up to no good, I know it!"

I think if there was a reason this film needed to be made it's because teenagers are getting a bad reputation for being horrifically vacuous, whether they're American or not. It's the age of X-Factor and you can't be blamed for feeling utter despair at the parade of fame-hungry zeroes and idiots masquerading as teenage human beings in the media. Red Dawn attempts to combat this by showing a group of teenagers that get to grips with some pretty heavy shit. They're out of their depth but learn how to fight back and shoulder responsibility, and for that, the film is worth commending.

In all, this is actually a pretty decent film and most involved now have a new calling card. Connor Cruise gives a sweet, understated performance and puts a great case across for being known as Connor Cruise the actor and not Connor Cruise, son of Tom. Hemsworth steps up to the plate to give another likeable turn. Personally though, I feel the real credit goes to Bradley. Because of Bradley, the movie is better than it would have otherwise been; the action is the best thing about Red Dawn. There's not oodles of it, its just effective when it happens. How much better would A Good Day to Die Hard have been had Bradley been in charge...?

  

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Top 5 Father & Son Team-ups

So as A Good Day to Die Hard stumbles on at the box office, I thought it would be a good time to offer our Top 5 Father & Son Team-ups!

No. 5 - Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998)
To get things started, we have what I genuinely believe would be stiff competition for the McClane duo. As good as Jai Courtney may have been, he just can't match the menace of a swearing 11 year old thug. And Vinnie Jones was on great form here in his movie debut, playing a dirty lowlife scumbag... I reckon they would've made for a good spin-off movie. Maybe we can get them cast as decent villains for Die Hard 6.

No. 4 - Vice Versa (1988)

Who the fuck, you might ask, is Fred Savage and what's a Judge Reinhold? Well, they're human beings and damn good ones too. Once upon a time they made a movie called Vice Versa which is basically a faitytale about a father and son who swap bodies. This is a truly horrifying idea and not one worth dwelling on. That to one side, Vice Versa was one of several films to address the "inner child" notion, same as Like Father Like Son (1987) and Big (1988). Why was this one so good? Mssrs Savage and Reinhold, that's why. They are the 80's here and something about them works really well - it's probably down to the fact that they're so damn likeable.

No. 3 - Return of the Jedi (1983)

I don't think that it'll spoil anything at this stage to mention that Luke Skywalker is the fruit of Darth Vader's loins. Yes, for 1.6 films we believed that Vader was going to spell the end for young Skywalker but in true Days of Our Lives fashion, Vader dropped the bomb that he was indeed Luke's father. No need for a DNA show there, Jeremy Kyle. It was when Luke was getting his ass handed to him by The Emperor that Vader finally decides to team up with his son. The Emperor is having so much fun making Skywalker blub like a baby that he does little to stop Vader from hoisting him up and plopping him into the abyss. Shit, was that another spoiler?!

No. 2 - Shogun Assassin (1980)

You may never look at a man with a sword pushing a pram in the same way again. Ogami Itto and son Daigoro (AKA Lone Wolf and Cub) are on a mission. The local Shogun decides to send a crack squad of ninjas to wipe out Ogami Itto and his family but they only manage to kill his wife. Big mistake. The father and son hit the road for one of the greatest revenge sagas ever made, with violence so horrific it's comical and music so damn cool RZA wishes he wrote it.

No. 1 - Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)

Just when we thought Indy couldn't get any better, they went and added River Phoenix and Sean Connery to the cast. Its a tribute to Phoenix that he made his short appearance so integral to the myth of Indy, but it was the genius casting of Connery as curmudgeonly Henry Jones that set the movie as the best entry of the three. Sorry, four... (ahem). Connery was only 12 years older that Harrison Ford but they work so sublimely that its seamless. It's fun to see Indy reduced to a teenager at Henry's constant slights and reprimands while its equally fun to watch Indy's frustration at his father for being such a fuddy-duddy. Their relationship conveys some truths of a father / son relationship while being sweet and funny. All while killing Nazis.

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Things we learned this week

1. Robert Downey Jnr's favourite TV Show is Banged Up Abroad. 
2. Richard Gere won't take work which involves him travelling more than an hour from his house. 
3. Zach Galligan enjoys grape flavour Jolly Ranchers. 
4. Paul Rudd would've been a better choice for the Death Wish remake.

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Review: A Good Day to Die Hard (2013)

A Good Day to Die Hard (2013)
Dir: John Moore
Cert 12A / Running time 98 mins

Die Hard is from the canon of franchises that are sacred and revered. Alongside Terminator, The Matrix, Star Wars and Indiana Jones. Unfortunately, just like all of those franchises, it too, can be fucked up. I'd got a sense for the reviews of A Good Day to Die Hard - they weren't great - but as I mentioned, its Die Hard. Sacred and revered. I went into the movie having parked all those comments and reviews and was prepared to let John McClane fire me up... It didn't happen. And it set about not happening pretty quickly.

Feeling like a Mission: Impossible movie from the opening credits, I watched just how McClane junior (played by Jai Courtney) winds up getting into the spot of bother which compels McClane senior (Bruce Willis) to hop on the first Aeroflot to Russia.

From there the movie is too eager to dive into the Kiss Kiss Bang Bang of things. Theres no build up before it all kicks off. I felt a kind of awkwardness as McClane casually steals a truck to pursue the heavies chasing his son. Then again as he "commandeers" another vehicle to continue the pursuit (are we really supposed to cheer along McClane when he smacks the mouth of a civilian whose car he just landed on, then steals?!). To give credit to director John Moore, the street chase does have certain moments and shots of real energy and impact. But I couldn't help thinking that McClane likely killed more innocent civilians in this Moscow car chase than terrorists in all of the Die Hard movies combined.

And this is part of the problem with A Good Day to Die Hard; its reckless. Not in a good risk taking way but in a lazy way. Examples? McClane emerges from otherwise traumatic accidents with no real physical or emotional consequences. Cars and weapons are to be found whenever they're needed - not earned through ingenuity or wit. "I always have a machine gun LOL". McClane senior wanders from one situation to the next looking worryingly like a bewildered old man, tagging along at times. The dialogue does little to crank up the tension or define anything interesting  about anyone. I really missed the McClane that uses an office chair, monitor and C4 to take out a floor of terrorists. The inconsolable McClane that watched a plane full of passengers perish despite his best efforts. The McClane that was made to jump through hoops to find the bomb in the New York school.

Dude, we totally fucked up Russia!

Another thing the film suffers from is not having a clear villain. It needed (as more and more action films are begging for) a villain thats engaging, darkly humorous, wicked and a credible threat to the hero. When the "twist" came (those of you who have seen the film will know what I'm talking about), I felt a little robbed and underwhelmed. So much so that for me the most effective surprise was offloaded in the first few minutes when the BBC's Sophie Raworth turned up to deliver some plot points.

But its not all negative. Jai Courtney was fairly decent as Jack McClane. It was a nice notion to see more of the McClane / Gennaro clan (surely we can work Holly into the next one?!). Bruce Willis shows no signs of slowing down (and why should he?) and with talk of a sixth Die Hard, I'm looking forward to see him continue to feature in more action movies.

"So...you got anyone in mind for the sixth one? Bruce?"

So ultimately, A Good Day to Die Hard wasn't just disappointing, it was frustrating. I was thinking of what it needed - not what it had. Den of Geek compiled a list of things they reckon the franchise needs to get back on track here. I agree with most of them.

John Moore's recent Empire interview had a lot of aggressive machismo, sadly this manifested itself in the film when it needed needed more than that. If its going to call itself a Die Hard movie, then it has to meet the standard. The standard it meets instead is that of too many mainstream action movies today, loud and obnoxious with little regard for an audience that expects better.

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Don't close the book, just write a new chapter: Part 2

In the spirit of the last article, we'd be remiss not to offer you an insight to cinema - Norn Irish style. What follows are mere glimpses of a dream, one we can allow ourselves to ponder on and think "what if?" What if it was Belfast, not Hollywoodland that pulled the strings...

Clint acknowledges the contentious fleg issue.

Imagine...Bruce delivering knuckle sandwiches up and down the Lagan.

Tom shows us what its like to be the most patriotic man in East Belfast.

All those years wondering what was under that suit at UTV? Now you know.

Robbins' and Freeman's take on how two Belfast men survive one of the cities most famous streets. 

Theres a storm coming. Will Marty and Peter help George and Marky-Mark to save the day?

See, Belfast would've had some major hits with these - who wouldn't want to see Enter The Lagan?!

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Don't close the book, just write a new chapter: Part 1

I watched Shadow Dancer a short while ago. This is the story of an IRA informant and her MI5 handler, a tale set in Belfast in the 1990's. The main thing I felt after watching it was disappointment - this wasn't a reflection on the quality of the film (it was OK), nor was it because not once did it feature a ninja accompanied by his dog - but because of how miserable a picture it painted of Belfast.

Now, for those of you who are reading this who happen to live in Belfast, I don't have to tell you how unremarkable it was in the 1990's. Over the last decade or so the landscape has changed immensely - from both a commerce and a business perspective, again, both literally and figuratively. So admittedly, if we were to look back at pictures of Belfast from about twenty years ago, things were kinda drab. But not as drab as it was portrayed in Shadow Dancer. The locations in the movie were relentlessly grim and sparse when it came to Northern Ireland - it bugged me to the point where I refused to believe it ever looked that way. So I checked it out on imdb.com and sure enough, it wasn't actually filmed in Northern Ireland.

Of course, this is fine - using one location to double for another is pretty standard - but my point is that one of the main things people will be left with after having watched the movie will be to think how grim Northern Ireland is - yet again. You can check out just how many movies have used Northern Ireland's violent history as a backdrop here.

I think Northern Ireland needs a change. I know this place has had a tragic history. There are stories that needed to be told and audiences that needed to be reached. But, lets see what else we can do.

We have the talent and the enthusiasm. You need to look no further than the Film Devour Festival to see that. NI Screen and Invest NI are actively supporting local production companies (and if you fancy yourself as the  next Terry George or Seamus McGarvey, check out some funding direction here).

This is just the tip of the iceberg - my point is, Northern Ireland is very capable of making something that people won't see coming. Instead of The Devil's Own, Resurrection Man, Fifty Dead Men Walking and Hunger - lets make our own Grabbers, lets have our own version of The Guard, lets see our own Commitments! Maybe this is the time when things just might change - Ridley Scott (Sir / Lord / Der Führer himself) will be producing 6 feature films based in Northern Ireland. Don't ask how this divine gift was bestowed upon us, just go with it. The movies will be "focused primarily on horror, thriller and science fiction" and "potentially provides an outlet for developing Northern Ireland creative talent".

The timing is right and theres a sense of a shift of aspirations here. There's finally a real chance for us to throw off that old cloak and put on a hip leather biker jacket that we found for a fiver in Rusty Zip. If you have the skill, the passion or even just the interest - Norn Iron needs you, right now. Write that script you thought was too far fetched, sketch out that monster design you've been thinking of, take a camera and go rip off Predator in Ormeau Park - get invovled!

We cannot WAIT to see what everyone comes up with.

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Review: The Last Stand (2013)

The Last Stand (2013)

Dir: Kim Jee-woon

Cert 15 / Running time 107 mins

I remember when I was a lot younger - there was only one VHS player in my parent's house, it was in the living room. I'd discovered The Terminator whenever it appeared on TV late one night and as a result I made sure I kept my eyes peeled to tape it off the TV the next time it was on. When I finally possessed this Bush E-180 recording, it was never off TV. I was on summer holidays, so for two months I had my own screening room and it showed The Terminator, all day - every day (at least until my parents wanted to watch something). It was fair to say I was captivated. It had cyborgs, it had laser guns, machine guns, and boobies - everything a growing boy needs basically. But it also had a massive bloke in it who both terrified and intrigued me - Arnold Schwarzengger. So began my warm appreciation for the man and his movies.

Fast forward a lifetime and today I took my place in the cinema (a proper one) to see his latest movie, The Last Stand. Like Arnie - I've been around the block. I know that sometimes the biggest anticipation can lead to the biggest disappointment (I'm looking at you, Matrix Revolutions) so I sat down with the full knowledge that this in all likelihood wouldn't be a perfect movie by any means.

With no action set-piece to kick things off, we're left a while to see what kind of energy Kim Jee-woon will bring to the movie. When the scene is set for Arnie's small-town Sheriff, Ray Owens (its funny how often Arnie - a guy with a think Austrian accent - still plays characters with “regular Joe” names) its a familiar scene. Sleepy town, not much happens. Except newly escaped drug lord Martinez (Eduardo Noriega) will soon be rolling Arnie's way in his supercar. To pave Martinez's way to freedom in Mexico is a crew of badasses straight from The A-Team, led by Peter Stormare.

Unfortunately it doesn't feel like the movie really takes off until Stormare's gang wheel into Sommerton main street. By then Arnie has assembled a gang of deputies, including Johnny Knoxville, who plays pretty much the same character he did in Walking Tall. The rest consist of the always awesome Luis Guzman, an underused Rodrigo Santoro and Jaimie Alexander.

Come back, its only a flare gun!

By then we have a villain in Martinez that lacks the compelling "X" factor of really good movie villains, some clunky delivery from Arnie and a lead-up to a showdown that doesn't do a lot to crank up the tension. But let's be honest - you or I won't be sat watching this movie because its got the storytelling of a Tarantino, or the concept of a Nolan, or the style of a Snyder - we're watching it because its the first real Schwarzenegger film in ten years. It doesn't matter that Arnie's acting chops are a little rusty, or that we know how its going to play out, or that the villain won't be in the Hall of Fame. Its a platform to see him pick up a big gun and blow the sweets out of bad guys. And that he does. Despite it wisely being more of an ensemble piece than a one-man army, Arnie gets plenty of chances to show us he still has a fondness for Phased Plasma Rifles in the 40 Watt Range. Its towards the last third of the film we get to see what Kim Jee-woon brings - apart from exploding henchmen. There's glimpses of flair and humour amongst exploding-head violence, there's Arnie still delivering his quotable one-liners while also nodding to the fact that its been a while since he was asked for ID in the offies.

From this range, Im a surgeon with this thing

What it boils down to is a man on man, toe to toe beatdown between Arnie and Martinez. At this point I suspected that my willingness to suspend disbelief might get severely tested - but I shouldn't have worried. The showdown has heart and a certain believability (more or less). By the time the credits roll - did I feel disappointed? No. Its not Arnie's Rocky Balboa - its not a comeback that will prove everybody wrong. Its not even in his top ten BUT it is a comeback and we're now into a new era of Schwarzengger. Maybe thats the most important thing.

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